Things I have learned

My notable absence hasn't been because I've been working out and eating so well I haven't had time to check in. Oh, quite the contrary my friends! 


I have been living it up, eating copious amounts of garbage and being in total denial about the fact that I have probably put on about 2-3kg of the 5.5kg that I have worked so hard to shed. 


In reviewing where it all went horribly wrong here are the things I have learned:


- Giving yourself a "day off" your so called "lifestyle change" is NOT how you change your lifestyle!! Healthy people don't have days off, they don't have allowable binges, they may have the odd overindulgence but they SELF CORRECT - something I have not yet learned to do!
- Three chocolate bars in one bus trip is not ok
- Eating two lunches is not ok
- Skipping the gym because I am too full is not ok
- In order to reach your goals, your actions must be in line with the end result, not going the opposite way
- drinking half a bottle of wine by myself is not ok
- using food as a way to overcome emotions I don't understand is not ok
- using food as a way to overcome emotions I do understand is not ok


- Self forgiveness is ok.


So, I am back on track now that we are back from our long weekend away it's time to figure this out.
When you go on about a million diets you get pretty in tune with your body and how it reacts to certain things. I've learned a few things recently:
1. I am super sensitive to sugar
2. I am also quite sensitive to caffeine (never thought I was)


Both these chemicals make my brain race and the coffee can give me the shakes. Too much sugar in the form of lollies (candy) makes my stomach hurt. 


I've decided to cut out sugar and alcohol for the time being, as well as continuing to minimise processed foods as much as possible as I always do (they play havoc with my digestive system). I'm going to lay off the calorie counting for a wee bit as I have just invested a tonne of cash in a Personal Trainer who I will be meeting up with once a week and sharing a food diary with. She will point out where portion sizes might be too big or food choices might not be working. I had an initial chat with her last week and she seems really good, totally understood what I was after and where I am coming from and for once I feel that I've communicated well with a trainer, rather than lacking the confidence to say what I need from her. 
As a guide foodwise I am using the basic idea from the bootcamp meal programme I got from the gym last year, I'm having a lot of snacks from it but also I'm using the calorie and macro nutrient profile from the meals to start creating some of my own. I'm hoping I can become a bit more in tune with my body this way rather than going off how many calories I'm putting in.


Lots to think about really, tomorrow I'll assess the damage on the scales. I feel bitterly disappointed but all I can do is put my chin up and move on. 


Sad face.